This Is our Village

Thursday, November 16, 2017

DEALING WITH DIFFICULT PEOPLE - BY DAVID ST. JOHN - ESQ.

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The time fast approaches for our Annual Meetings, so I thought the following item by Attorney St. John might be useful:
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Dave Israel
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1 comment:

  1. Old Nassau '67November 20, 2017 at 11:05 AM

    Another professional opinion about dealing with a disruptive resident. (From Condo News, 11/8/17, author Chelle Konyk, Esq.

    QUESTION

    We have hit the jackpot – we have a problem with a board member and another owner who both become argumentative, loud, abusive and threatening to the point we are in fear of violence. We are then obliged to end the meeting abruptly.

    What recourse do we have?

    ANSWER

    A disruptive unit owner or board member makes everyone's life miserable. In fact, even if he or she has a good idea - very few board members will listen because of the frequent outbursts. Often this is the guy who stands up and quotes 718 in part but never in the right part!

    One thing that can help is to provide your board with a primer on condo law. There are several good ones available and your property manager can probably help you find one. This is a preferably method for the layperson to avail themselves with enough understanding of the law to be able to perform the duties of a board member. Additionally, rely on your property manager and association attorney to fill in the blanks or to deal with difficult issues.

    There are things the board can and should do to avoid confrontations such as this, since these outbursts serve no real purpose and are rarely the catalyst for the change the unit owner is seeking. This person feeds off confrontation and the reaction that others have to his or her outbursts. There are several things that may help diffuse the situation. The most important thing is to remain calm and not let him or her get you to shout back. I know it sounds easier than it may be at first - but remember - you cannot control this person, only your reaction.

    The board must put policies in place to distance themselves from the unit owners in regards to board matters. A board member must not answer questions if they are approached outside of a board meeting as then the board that board member is acting independent of the board. All board business should be discussed at a board meeting with an opportunity for the entire board to consider and vote on issues.

    If there is a community association manager, he or she should be the point person to discuss issues with the owners. If the person has a legitimate request for information, try to make sure he or she is given that information before the meeting.

    Very often, this person can be controlled if you get to the "real" basis for the outburst. As a board member- you are not expected to delve into his or her deep-seated issues - but it may be something obvious and easily resolved. Does he or she feel that the community in some way slighted him or her? Was he or she not invited to assist in preparing for a community event? A real pro can turn a negative into a positive if they can get to the basis for his disruptive behavior. It may be as simple as being denied a request to paint a mailbox. Explaining the basis for the denial may calm things down. If this person thinks the meeting notice should be posted in the mail room of every building - not just on the main bulletin board - give him the necessary copies and thank him for offering to post the notice himself. In other words – don't sweat the small stuff.

    That said, - this person has probably been difficult most of his or her life – so remember this, he or she has years of experience and is very talented when it comes to upsetting the apple cart. Try to remember the good people in your community who truly benefit from your sacrifices and show their appreciation. After the next board meeting - take the good guys in the community home in your thoughts - and don't give this person any more power over your free time.



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